Communication is a two-way process, which involves talking,listening, and understanding. To communicate effectively, we need to be openand honest, to say clearly, what we mean, while respecting our partner’sfeelings and rights.
Communication occurs at more than one level. How our bodies‘speak’, or the so-called body language is also very important. It seems wetend to trust body language rather than words. Once we understand the body’smessage, we are able to interpret the way in which words are said. We listen towhether a person’s sounds angry or sad, happy or exited, and we look to seewhether their body is relaxed, tense, or defensive. If the person’s words andbody language contradict each other, we are unable to trust their words, andcommunication becomes much more difficult. Unless you and your partnerunderstand how each other communicate – both body language and words – you willbe unable to understand each other. Communication can get even more difficultif we are not sure of our exact feelings and say the first thing that comes tomind in an argument, rather than think it over.
Part of communicating is negotiating. This means giving ourpoint of view and listening to our partner’s point of view, coming up with allthe possible options, and then finding solutions that will satisfy both. Thiscan be stimulating, rewarding, and even fun. It involves thinking and listeningclosely to our partners.
Good communication can help you and your partner to becomecloser and build a stronger, more satisfying relationship. It is also anessential tool for sorting out problems in your relationship.
